Friday, December 31, 2010

Happy New Year's Eve!

may 2011 be full of many many possibilities. Ones you're plotting and ones you didn't see coming. This is one of my favorite views and I like to think that before I kick it (a long long looooooooooooong time from now) I will have had as many adventures and opportunities as there are branches on that tree. Big ones and little ones and the ones in between.

That being said, our adventurous NYE is Easy A, The A-Team and the new Resident Evil movie. I have my fingers crossed because last year we had three of the best movies I saw all year all on New Year's Eve. Julie and Julia, Paranormal Activity (which no one found scary until bed time and then we were creeped the fuck out) and The Hangover. So, I doubt we could recreate such a stellar line up, but we'll see.

Now food. I believe my family has chosen: nachos, mussels, hot wings, cream cheese and lox bites, bacon and onion dip and pickled herring (*shudder*). I will be in the corner eating soft gluten free stuff and taking my pain pills. Heh.

Hope yours is grand and as super exciting and festive as ours! I wish for you lots of little branches of adventure and opportunity in the coming year. Tada!


Thursday, December 30, 2010


I have had a half a pain pill! That means that I am stupider than I was this morning before my dentist appointment and after the man kept me up all night. All. Night. And not doing dirty stuff, either. Snoring. I have blogged about it here because bright and early with only one brain cell functioning I found the topic fascinating.

So now I am running on about 4 hours sleep and 1/2 a pain pill. Because soon I need a root canal. (o_O) Trust me, 1/2 is all I need. I am a total light weight. Off I go to write. Believe it or not I can write like this. I can't barely string a spoken sentence together, but I can actually write. Go figure.


that is a random Christmas tree picture. enjoy!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Why for a brief moment in Christmas time *I* was the man...

and why I am still wife of the year. Behold, the newest member of the family, my gift to the man. Guess what our neighborhood smells like? If you guessed woodsmoke, you are a genius!


Tuesday, December 28, 2010

just let my get my handy dandy vacuum...

I dreamt last night that I went to camp. I have no idea how old I was supposed to be but I felt and looked pretty much like me, I think. So that was odd. And my mother and I showed up hours late and in the dark.

People (that I went to high school with!) were pointing us in the right direction, and we basically knew where we were, but it was one of those instances where you just sort of feel like you're skating by on the skin of your teeth.

Then I asked (as we continue to stumble around in the dark on these paths) if there is still time to take me home because I have forgotten my phone, which I was allowed to have...and a sleeping bag...a tent. I have forgotten damn near everything that would classify this as 'camping'. And she says sure, but then I turn to find her vacuuming up leaves with a little vacuum...

WTF. I'm saying "Ma! Leave them! They are leaves! In their natural environment. This is where one would expect to find leaves..."

And then I woke up, panicky because I did not have my phone. Or sleeping bag.

No. I haven't a clue what that means. But there you have it.

p.s. boy child and girl child have both gone to fifth grade sleep away camp. They did not forget a single thing. Especially!!! Just sayin'

Monday, December 27, 2010

okay, so it turned me on...

Today's been a weird day. Wind and a scattering of dry snow on the ground. Girl child and I running errands in the insane wind that had her big heavy shopping bag from the bookstore literally banging my leg so hard it hurt.

Then I came home and wrote four pages of my mainstream and then three pages of my bed. Then I bed. Then I watched Psych and ate mini chocolate bars--wait for it--in bed! That is so unusual for me, but damn was it decadent. My room is sunny and open and big and to lay there in the sunbeams and just be after so much Christmas craziness was super nice.

What's the burger about? The burger is about this really really handsome man who was driving in a car behind me earlier. He had dark hair and dark glasses on and dark coat and he was kind of exotic looking and burly and he was eating a burger like...okay, so it turned me on. He ate it with a huge amount of predatory glee without being gross or nasty or messy or anything. It was the most amazing thing I'd ever seen in the burger eating department. I didn't have a mental image for my lycan in the my current book. Now I do...


Happy windy Monday.


Sunday, December 26, 2010

"**SNAPS** again for Sommer and her fantastico way...

OMG. Someone give me a big giant shove to help me get my big giant head through that little tiny doorway! Another enormously flattering review from Seriously Reviewed. This one for my very first Christmas novel ever "Christmas Break". You can read the whole thing here.

I must have been a very very good girl this year to deserve so many nice things said about me. :)


"...this one was just as good as I figured it would be."

Yay! This review from Seriously Reviewed came in Christmas Eve for my holiday novella. Happy Christmas Eve to me. :)

I have to admit, it still startles me when folks call me one of their favorite authors or I find that authors I know and have been reading forever suddenly show up liking my work. It makes my brain ache. It's like trying to pair peanut butter and garlic in my mind. I have such a hard time but am always very flattered.

We had a fabulous Xmas Eve dinner here and then a great Christmas morning, afternoon and night. The man loved his huge grill and smoker. It's about the size of a small car. LOL. And me...I am the proud owner of a brand new pair of dark leather driving moccasins and Supernatural season 5 and custom artwork from one of my favorite artists and...a bunch of other stuff.

It's snowing right now and I'm about to have wine. Yay wine! Hope you had a fabulous holiday. Drop me a comment and tell me your favorite part if you're sitting there all exhausted and stuffed with food with a drink in your hand...

Friday, December 24, 2010

Ho Ho Ho, I'm On Fire...

Oh. Not for real. It's just that my new book from EC is out today. Yay me! What a great gift. Gee, I hope I don't manage to start a fire tonight. If you see the blog below my odds are rather good. Um...anyway! Off I go. I need a coffee infusion and then have a buncha holiday stuff to attend to. I'm awake now, after getting one more look at my smoking hot cover. Whew.

Merry Christmas Eve!



Thursday, December 23, 2010

This is what Christmastime means to me...

No. Not city sidewalks...

But all kinds of other stuff. This year, for whatever reason, it truly feels Christmasy to me. Last year was cold (finally! we've had some downer warmish years for a while) but TOO much snow. Enough snow to put everything at a stand still and/or crawl it too much. This year it's cold and blowy. A dusting of snow. It's still on the roads. It's picturesque but it's not debilitating. Plus, I'm ODing on Christmas music in my travels, listening to our local lite station that plays it 24/7 starting the day after Thanksgiving.

Anyway, I was driving to the store for my last-last-lastly-LAST minute food stuff for Christmas Eve dinner at my house tomorrow. And I was thinking about how I have always loved Christmas and that it has a specific feel to me. So here are a few things from my childhood that I remember vividly. You're welcome.

*The year I had about a thimble full of wine and fell up the steps. I was about twelve. It was all downhill from there.

*The year Santa set off I TOOK A LICKIN' FROM A CHICKEN in the attic. I was still awake. I was faking it.

*The year Santa brought me a Barbie outfit for my Barbie because my 'best friend' had stolen the exact same outfit when she came to play.

*The year I got clogs and instantly proceeded to fall down in the street trying to run across and show my friend. And then the scariest man in the whole neighborhood found me and carried me home. I was traumatized for...well, I am still traumatized.

*My mother always made Baklava. If you don't know what this is, it is paper thin sheets of phyllo dough and honey and walnuts and it is an act of God that you can even get these ingredients to adhere together, let alone have them make a delicate, crispy perfect dessert. She always had the help of a nice rum and Coke and some smokes. (My mom smoked back in the day but hasn't for about 12 years, go ma!). I mention the rum and Coke because we all need some spirits during the holidays, but if it had been me (as I have worked with phyllo dough) I'd have been drinking the Bacardi straight from the bottle with a crazy straw. Fuck the Coke.

*The year my dad decided to stain the entertainment center on Xmas Eve and the fumes were damn near overwhelming and we were all half high from fumes and the windows were open and it was freezing and my mother was yelling about the goddamn sugar cookies(!!!!)

*Same year: my dad asking my one hundred pound (soaking wet with a brick in each hand), five foot five boyfriend to help him move the ginormous entertainment center. Christ. It would have been more productive to ask me. Or the wiener dog.

*The year I thought that wearing my green and white candy cane striped footy pajamas and totally wrapping my feet in tin foil to resemble boots would be a brilliant and festive costume!

*Sitting around my aunt's table while all the adults drank and smoked and gossiped. I had huge ears and the ability to record all the gory details in my super snappy mind (that has now started to fail me. heh.)

*The year I fell down my aunt's front steps and managed to hook my foot in the railing so I ended up with my skirt around my neck doing a rather impressive yet excruciating split. (In her defense she had yelled, careful! the steps are icy! and I yelled No! They're just wet-aaaaaaaaaaah!)
*The year I asked for one of these (<~~~see photo insert) and sprained my groin.

*The year my grandmother gave me and my sister matching purses that looked like macrame plant hangers. We still begin opening her gifts with: I hope it's not a purse...

*And just a few years ago, watching A Christmas Story, no lie, THREE times before the kids finally fell asleep.

These are just a few of the gems. I have always been blessed with fab Christmases that I hope I'm passing down to my kids. Fingers crossed.

I also remember that my mother ALWAYS made Christmas super and festive no matter how stressed she was, what doofy boyfriend I had that year, or what kind of hoopla was going on . She was brilliant, always giving me a book on Christmas Eve so that a) I got a gift and b) I was occupied unless she needed me. I never minded helping because I loved Christmas. One of my favorite things to help with was wrapping. I remember many years of wrapping in front of the TV or radio while she did whatever (Baklava!) in the kitchen. I had a good run of Bloom County books for several years. I still have them. Opus and I have had some very merry Christmas Eves together. I still heart Opus.

So if you want and have the time, take a moment to share a memory with me. Yes, it's crazy and stressful and all that jazz, but it sure is fun too. And it can be a huge part of the fabric of memories we all have as we grown and age and start families of our own. (Hallmark, call me, I could write cards ;) )


Wednesday, December 22, 2010

A Gift To You...

from me! Now until December 31st, if you punch coupon code FH28E (not case sensitive)in the coupon code section at Smashwords, you will get KINKY FOR CHRISTMAS for free. Go on, get kinky for Christmas, you know you want to...

The picture here is my 2010 portrait. Every year I try and remember to take a picture of the print anthologies I'm in or my own print books from that year. It helps me remember that all the weird hours really are for a reason. And it also helps remind me that I do actually work. Sometimes I feel like I don't...

I'll be scarce the next few days as our annual Xmas Eve dinner is swiftly approaching and there is pit beef to be made and quiche and all kinds of other stuff. Ho ho ho!


Tuesday, December 21, 2010

oh. ma. gott.

Another review. It must be all the good deeds I did this year earning me all these little shiny reviews right before Christmas. This one is for Ferryman, a favorite of mine, and one--I have to admit--that I've been holding my breath over. I've heard tons about Unexpected, but nary a word about Ferryman. Until now from Seriously Reviewed. Oh, baby, it was worth the wait.

Stuff like "This story was brilliantly layered..." had me smiling--hugely, happily, and okay a bit stupidly...heh. Read the whole review here!


Monday, December 20, 2010

And for my holiday novella "Pretty In Pink"...

a nice review too. My stocking overfloweth with nice things from great review sites. Like: "a light and humorous holiday-themed novella that gives a new definition to the phrase "love thy neighbor." and "Whether Kimber and Charlie are coming together for the first time or fumbling around in the back of a pickup truck, these two aren’t content to make love silently. They talk and tease and just plain have fun, and the effect is both sensual and grin-inducing."

Yay me and ho, ho, ho!


"Unexpected by Sommer Marsden is a fast-paced, feel good book..."

Four stars and a really bright way to start my day. I'm flattered and thrilled with the NOR review by Daisiemae of Unexpected.

This made me smile! ~~~> "Sommer Marsden is a relatively new author for me, and I have to confess, after reading Unexpected, I plan on keeping an eye out for more books written by her."

If you'd like to see the rest of the review it's here.

p.s. the punctuation issues Daisiemae mentions is the British vs. American way of setting off dialogue. I have to admit, I'm still getting used to it myself, but I just wanted to point that out. :)

Saturday, December 18, 2010

save the neck for me, Clark...

It's birthday brunch day here at casa de crazy. Since nine I've been puttering and prepping and trying to keep the breadish things away from the gluten free safe for me to eat things. I have had coffee and tried to find a table cloth (impossible), then I settled on artfully arranging some vintage dinner napkins I recently found at a rummage sale as a table runner.

For some reason, having folks over that I see all the time--every year--to my house for holiday festivities (which my birthday and my sister's birthday fall under due to us both being December babies) freaks me out. And tension and stress can run high. So there's joking and pauses to be kissed or hugged after being snappish (usually on my part) between the man and I.

And almost every holiday season, someone says too much and hurts someone's feelings. Orrrrrr someone just acts like a loon (the verbal equivalent of putting cat food in the Jell-O mold) and freaks someone else out. There is often at least one bruised emotion or act of insanity. At some point. Every. Year.

What my mother and I like to call "Another good old fashioned Griswold Christmas". Unless one of us is the offender/offended. Then we joke about it after the fact.

Hope your holiday is turning out to be stress free and fun or at least you can laugh about it later. And save the neck for me, Clark...


Friday, December 17, 2010


It’s another theme song day. It snowed yesterday afternoon and the roads were covered but passable. It was really no big deal. Until this morning. Which is when we all overslept. I mean overslept as in we woke up at the time boy child should be leaving the house most days. Then came a mad rush like a flock of birds all trying to take off in flight at once. I flipped on the news—here comes the part where I misread the ticker and thought we were two hours late. We all breathed a deep sigh of relief…*whew* Then the man called to pop my bubble and tell me…no! We were not two hours late. Get a move on! Bwah!

Then there were pop tarts and seltzer water (I’m out of juice) and cussing. Some yelling and stomping. Wet shoes and car clearing. Raised voices and weeping. And that was just me. [or it felt like it]. I blindly tossed on clothes and took boy in, my coffee is something I tossed together in a travel mug and I’m not sure if it’s even actually, technically safe to drink. But girl child has just left to go to bus stop and dog is curling up against my leg and…ah. Peace.
Oh wait. It’s Friday right? I have to go shop for food for the brunch at my house tomorrow. (o_O) Balls!

So I bring to you some Gene Loves Jezebel to kick off your morning. I love this album. Can you say ooh-la-la eighties? It was the first 'album' I bought on CD. Ever. Hold on...let me get my cane.


Thursday, December 16, 2010

a nibble of my holiday erotic romance Pretty In Pink

less calories than sugar plums...but he looks pretty tasty to me :) The whole book can be found here at Excessica and also at ARe and Bookstrand and etc etc etc and also. heh.

From Pretty In Pink
by Sommer Marsden
copyright 2010

The sound filled her home again. A deep groan shook her teeth in her head and made her stomach turn.

“It’s okay,” Charlie laughed touching her hip.

When his fingers touched her there, she sighed. It was involuntary, like sneezing or blinking.

“I'm embarrassed,” she admitted.

“Don’t’ be.” Charlie moved past her, his bulk crushing to hers for just a moment and the fact that she wasn’t breathing from nerves made white flowers and spots bloom in her vision. Kimber sucked in a deep breath and he laughed softly. That laugh was like his lips on her skin. So intimate and knowing that she shivered. Another moan and Charlie lifted the window. “It’s just a noise, Kimber. It sounds way worse than it is.”

“Right! Right. It sounds way worse that it is.”

“Just like you thinking I was actually sorry I’d kissed you. That sounded way worse than it was.”

He leaned out the window and she held her breath, afraid he would fall but mesmerized by the grace with which he moved. The flex of his arms inside that heather gray hoodie. The hard lines of his thighs in his soft-looking pajama pants.

If she touched her hand to the fabric, would it be as soft as it looked? Until she got to the fly? Then would it be hard? A girl could only hope.

“You said you were sorry.”

Bang, bang, bang. She jumped a little with every impact.

“But I meant it was wrong of me. Not that I actually regretted the kiss itself.” He hauled himself back in and stood tall. God, he was big.

“Oh, I thought you meant…”

“Your lips taste like red hots, did you know that?” He winked and shut the window. A warm rush of fluid moistened the crotch of her panties. She was so very, very hot for this guy. Which was so very, very wrong on many levels.

“I use this cinnamon lipglo—”

She didn’t get to finish because he moved in close to kiss her. His head dipped and his mouth pressed to hers. His lips, soft and warm, tasted like mint toothpaste. He hauled her closer and held her waist in his big hands. The cold of them seeped through her pink penguins, causing her to shiver. He pulled her even farther into his embrace. Charlie’s mouth toured down her throat and his thumbs stroked her nipples so they pressed the thin fabric of her pajamas. The thrill of his touch pulsed through her belly, her pussy, and even her fingers. She was loose and limber. She was made of jelly. And her ears were ringing. She pushed her hands into his hair and tugged until his hips shot forward; his hard-on undeniable.

“Your skin tastes like Spring. Which is good considering how fast the snow is falling.” He didn’t let her answer. His hands scooped under her bottom and he lifted her easily, walking to the bed. He planted her on the edge and tugged at her penguin pants. “Out of these, please? I won’t regret it.” His voice, dark and intense, made her move on the bed like a wave of long hair and long limbs. “Will you?”

Would she?

Charlie studied her, lifting her now bare leg up and kissing the inside of her knee. The tingling parade of sensation marched straight to her cunt and she wanted him more than the next lungful of air. “No. I won’t regret it. Be gentle. It’s been a while.”

She laughed and so did he. “For me, too,” Charlie said.

Pick a storyline…

Guest blogging at Excessica today. Tell storyline, two storyline, three storyline...four?

Pick a storyline...any storyline...



Wednesday, December 15, 2010

shut up and let me see your jazz hands...

I started today by putting my sweatshirt on backwards in the dark. Then when I realized, I said a [deleted] word and then proceeded to put my slippers on the wrong the dark. Then I came down and the man was home (his headlights died) and then the boy's walking buddy said he was catching a ride seeing as it is...9 degrees! So drove boy in. Then drove man to drop of car. In the midst of all of this my brand new shiny phone was binging at me because me and the kids got new phones with unlimited texting yesterday. What's faster than me on a laptop keyboard? Kids on a teeny weenie little texting keyboard. Insanity. I'm still learning. Me and my [feels like] giant thumbs.

My god. I need to a) wake up and b) get some work done and c) stay warm. You know what that means? That means this day calls for a theme song. This is what's blaring as I psyche myself up to get down to bidness. My recommendation is (((PLAY IT LOUD)))

Morning, kidlets. Happy Hump Day


Tuesday, December 14, 2010

It's 23 degrees...

But with the insane and slightly scary wind chill factor it's waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay below that. Trust me, the tip of my nose and my cold little fingers will tell you so. I'm so happy to be done errands and in my slippers. This seems to be a really good day to go hunting. Are you hunting? If you're still have time! And it's a great excuse to stay in and keep warm.


Monday, December 13, 2010

and out today...

Is Ultimate Uniforms from Xcite. My story involves a rather different kind of uniform. The kind a person might be wearing if they asked "Would You Like Fries With That?" Oddly enough, also the name of my story!


It's my blogging day at The Self Publishing Revolution

I'm discussing how I broke Smashwords. More than once. Okay, so it just felt like it...


Saturday, December 11, 2010

how to confuse your household in under five minutes...

1. Stick your head in boy child's room and say "You're father is out. The moment he gets home I want to go so you can shop. Be ready. Five minutes! Do you hear me!" [he says yes]
2. Go to get dressed.
3. Hear the front door.
4. Continue to get dressed.
5. Hear a knock on bedroom door.
6. Hear "It's just me." Man enters.
7. Keep getting dressed.
8. Have him say, "Hey there, girlie. Where ya going so fast?"
9. Explain last minute begging for chauffeured ride to Xmas shop.
10. Get kissed. Get touched. Get asked "And here I was thinking we could..."
11. Stick your head in boy child's room and say "Um, I forgot I had to do something. But I want to leave in a half an hour! Do you hear me!" [hey says. um...yes?]
12. Get looked at funny by child as you tug door shut (fast!).
13. Get lucky.

Oh, I love to start Saturdays with a bang. Happy weekend.


Friday, December 10, 2010

I know it's snowing outside...

as we speak, but my new cover makes me feel all warm inside. Or is it just me?

Yay! Coming December 24th to Ellora's Cave. The book, not...never mind. Merry Christmas to me and happy hunkadays! What? Oh. Holidays. Happy holidays.


You're welcome!

Everyone is giving me fab confessions below. From Shar's Go, You Chicken Fat, Go (horrible, truly) to Aisling's Clap (Um, clap on clap off, not that kind of...nevermind), to Willsin's implanting the Billy Ocean worm in my brain. Oh, and thanks to Cass for restarting us on the Hippo Christmas song (we got so fixated on that song one Xmas I bought boy child a huge stuffed hippo for Xmas). And Emerald's odd Xmas fetish...

But this song...oh this is the mother of all fixation songs. So bad that...well, we put this in each other's head around here. And then we wait for it to pass and then we look at the recent survivor of the Mahna Mahna worm and say...


You're welcome.


Thursday, December 9, 2010

A dirty, dirty secret confession...

I found myself in line at Joanne Fabrics the other day. I found this on the overhead. I found myself...singing it. Yes! Me!

I have the ability--often great--sometimes horrifying--to recall and sing the lyrics to almost every song I've ever heard. The loved, the tolerated and the abhorred. So there I stood in line at Joanne's singing along to Dan Freakin' Fogelberg. Then on the way to the mall (I was Christmas shopping don't ya know) REO Speedwagon came on. Singing, singing, singing--me.

Now I was never ever a fan of REO Speedwagon, but I do know every song of theirs ever played on the radio thanks to my brain. I cannot remember why I went upstairs but I know all the lyrics to Take It On The Run. However...I will cop to being a fan of Dan Fogelberg...Gordon Lightfoot (Gah, get me drunk and get me to sing The Wreck of the Edmond Fitzgerald) and Harry Freakin' Chapin (Mr. Tanner was a cleaner from a town in the midwest...). So there. I said it. I do not like REO Speedwagon but I know all the words to The Cats in the Cradle by Mr. Chapin (and 30,000 Pounds of Bananas) and Thank God I'm A Country Boy by John Denver (groan). And Rubberband Man by the Spinners...Father and Son by Cat Stevens. Oh gosh. I'm going to stop now...

Now you. You go. Tell me what song is stuck in a head as you unload the dishwasher.


Wednesday, December 8, 2010

And it's...

Mainstream with a close second being the non-vamp/were paranormal. And sneaky funny Aisling Weaver said she voted for mainstream because she knew to take a break from it I'd write smut. My god. When did I become so transparent! But she's right.

So off I go, later today. Me and my half done crime novel that I have to yank out in shards and chunks. Looks like there will be a lot of shards and chunks this holiday season. Um...eew? (o_O) You know what I mean.

Speaking of this holiday season...I am nearly done all my shopping/prep (knock wood, throw salt). I am also happy to report that I have yet to hear the Christmas shoe song and it will be a hap-hap-happy fucking holiday if I NEVER EVER DO THIS YEAR! (Santa, that is what I'd like from you. No shoe song)


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Pick a book...Any book...

I'm swimming in ideas and can't decide. And I'm bored. So a poll. I'll run this until I decide I can't stand it anymore.

What's winning then is what I'll go for. Tada!


Monday, December 6, 2010

It wouldn't be the Christmas season without...

The Hanukkah song! They played it on the radio when I was driving boy child to school this morning. They've been playing this since I was in high school (how did that happen?) and now he gets so stoked to hear it like I always have. So we sang along until we got too close to school and he had to pretend as if he didn't know me.

Now if I could just get them to play Adam Sandler's Mother's Day song on Mother's Day, that would be awesome. Happy Monday, folks. Back to work...


Sunday, December 5, 2010

If the farmers at the market knew what I was thinking...

they might not have sold me their lovely vegs. Then again, they might have given me a discount! The story inspired by some wandering walks through the local farmers' market appears in the lovely Ms. Tyler's book Eat Me out now, now, now! And we all love to eat during the holidays, now don't we?

Include stories by:

Sommer Marsden
Jax Baynard
N.T. Morley
Merry Stanshall

I would say more but my brain is chicken fried and dip dyed. I am frazzled. Girl child tricked me into "running out for a gift" which actually equals Christmas shopping. A quick trip turned into a two hour jaunt. Call me crazy but I much preferred my version of Christmas shopping last night. Leggings, sweats, socks, wine and a sofa. Now that is a merry fucking Christmas. You can keep the insane, mobbed, stores. Eesh!

But I did get fabric. Yay!


p.s. If I'm missing links email and I'll add!

Friday, December 3, 2010

This is Charlie....

and I gotta say, I would so not mind finding him in my stocking ;) My new Christmas novella Pretty In Pink is out today from Excessica. Woohooo! And Yippee!

Here is the blurb:

Kimber Daniels knows what they say about assuming and how a person should never do it. But she can't help but assume her new neighbor Charlie Brewster is gay. What with is matching curtains, brand new filigree bird bath and that pink flamingo on his front lawn dressed in its cute little holiday Santa outfit. It's wrong to assume, but she does anyway, especially when he answers the door in a bright pink tulip covered robe.

It seems only logical that Charlie's a safe guy to be around when all other men are on her naughty list. While her best friend Sarah is trying to convince Kimber to make the moves on Charlie because he's a good guy, Kimber's trying to convince Sarah that Charlie is totally off limits and is simply the kind of man that sugar plum dreams are made of.

An excerpt can be found on the site.

Beyond this nice shiny release, today is looking like a poop cracker as the man would say. So I would very much love it if you'd send me some nice happy vibes.'s okay you dizbang frantic woman...Om...

LOL. That should work!


Thursday, December 2, 2010

A nifty Christmas gift...

My next Ellora's Cave book I'm On Fire is slotted for Christmas Eve. Woohoo and ho ho ho! I'm super excited because this is my very first contemporary novella for EC. All my other work has been paranormal. Go figure. The girl writer who once said they scared her now writes them regularly. Freaky deaky. But not this one, this one is a contemporary and I'm stoked.

Anyway, all my others have been chock full of ghost and phantoms and angels and werewolves (Oh my!) but this one has a hunky hot fireman and a woman who decides to set her own kitchen on fire. Okay, so it was an accident. But hey, hunky hot fireman are just as intoxicating as supernatural creatures. In fact, I think they have their own range of special um...abilities.



Wednesday, December 1, 2010


in my 30's as of today. Today I am *gulp* 39. That is my joke to the man. FINAL NOTICE: 30'S ending dead ahead. But I woke to a lovely note, emails galore, well wishes and a chalk written message on my front porch telling me how much I'm loved. Written at about five a.m. in the dark and hugely windy monsoon we are currently experiencing. And I got my overseas birthday spanking from Willsin Rowe. Which I will thusly share with you, dear reader. In a bit I'm out for the day with my mom. This totally cracked me up :D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>

Now I'm running to answer the ringing phone. The countdown begins: the last December 1st as a 30-something...


Tuesday, November 30, 2010

More Time To Write Porn Slow Cooker Turkey Breast:

And easy squeezey recipe so you don't go mad. I'm on day two of feeling behind the moment I wake up. Tomorrow I am 39! How DID THAT HAPPEN!? Today I have to shop for the stuff so the man can make my dinner (he took me out last week for an early fun-birthday-date day :) ) and I did edits and I have proofing and...*gasp*

The older I get, the more frazzled I feel during the holidays. But I still love them. You'd think now that the kids are older, I'd feel less stressed, the answer is! Anyway, I tend to make up super fast easy "recipes" during the holidays to save myself a step. Say, oh, dinner cooking all day while I'm running errands and working on edits. I'll post some here on the blog during the holidays. You can thank me later. Heh ;)

More Time To Write Porn Slow Cooker Turkey Breast
by Sommer Marsden:

#One boneless turkey breast. Leave that little napkin-sized bit of skin on if they give it to you.
#Smear skin with about 2-3 pats of butter (real butter!)
#Sprinkle heavily with your favorite spice blend. We use Todd's Bayou Dirt or Cajun Foreplay
#Cook on LOW in the slow cooker for 8-10 hours
#Use your drippings for gravy.
#Serve with egg noodles for non-GF folk or rice/rice noodles for Gluten Free option.
#Thank me later.

Seriously, the juiciest, most perfect turkey breast. Boy child aka the complainer lights up when I make this and it is gone almost before it hits the plate. That is what a frazzled pron writer calls a successful meal.

If you make it, make sure you let me know your results!

p.s. how badly do I want this apron? I mean, it even has a pocket for a flask. Can you put wine in a flask???? Oh, Santa...I have a new item to add to my list...

Monday, November 29, 2010

and now we enter...

the time of year where I feel behind the clock about ten minutes after I get up. Most days. Other days, I feel all glowy, cockle-warming, domestic bliss, Martha Stewart wanna be happiness as I putter and bake and craft. It's a crap shoot and I simply never can tell.

I'm also finishing my current book (which came out of nowhere and has blown by) so that makes the balance of birthday/decorating/shopping/prepping Christmas month that much more um...tweaky.

Here's a nibble of the current WIP as I strike things off my To Do List. So far I'm doing pretty good. How long until I lose steam and pop in the DVD of Fringe and veg out? Anyone wanna bet???

Happy Cyber Monday!

from Sommer's WIP:

“Put your shirt back on,” I growled. Mason froze. “You told him to say that, didn’t you?”

Mason chuckled, but buttoned his shirt. “No. But I’m just screwing with you. Hey, babe, I would so not be averse to a nice romantic encounter with you here or anywhere, but not under duress.”

“It’s a ghost. A spirit. Smoke and mirrors. Even if it is real, what could it possibly do to us?”

“I wouldn’t say that, Darl—“

Just then the overhead chandelier started swinging. Not an original part of the house, I’d wager, since this had been the main house on a working farm. However, it was huge and wrought iron and dominated the tall ceiling in the foyer. If it fell, I realized, not much was going to be spared. I moved down toward the sealed doors.

“There. We’re out of the line of fire,” I said to Mason in a calm conversational voice. Nothing like the coked up gerbil feeling I had on the inside.

“Yeah, I have a feeling that they—“

He didn’t get to finish when a piece of glass flew off the chandelier to crash at my feet. Then my breath stalled and my lungs kicked and panic swelled in me because I couldn’t quite breathe. It was as if my throat was wrapped in a icy cold hand that was squeezing for all its worth.


“Grmph,” I said.

“Darl? Your face is turning purple.”

I clawed at invisible hands that Mason couldn’t see. Hell, that I couldn’t see. But nothing worked. I waved my hands to him and he stepped forward, pulling at my neck and giving a startled hiss when he came in contact with the icy nothingness.

“Frmph!” I said. And then I grabbed Mason and kissed him as much as a woman being strangled can kiss.

Mason’s tongue found mine and the warm touch of wetness sizzled through my oxygen deprived brain. The grip on my throat loosened and I sucked in a sweet rush of stale historical air. “Oh god, that’s good,” I said.

“I am a good kisser,” Mason said, mellowed by the physical contact.

“I meant the air.”

*fabulous non-working (my favorite kind!) clock here

Saturday, November 27, 2010

I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen...

on any given day, but I remembered this song by Coach line for line. And I remembered what show it was from and who sang it. I think that's the first sign of senility. Anyway, the word Albania came into my sphere today and I immediately started singing this. Too good to pass up sharing this oldie but goody clip from Cheers. Which back in my day was a no-miss show that you raced home from wherever to catch!

Hope your Thanksgiving was full of love and laughter and good food. Hmm. Speaking of Thanksgiving, where is that classic food fight scene from Cheers...


Tuesday, November 23, 2010


Cheesecake-Stuffed Pumpkin Cupcakes. I'm in a reading/watching TV/baking/puttering state of holiday nirvana. Hope your holiday, however you celebrate, rocks. Happy Thanksgiving, peoples. :) See you Monday!

p.s. eat gluten free and want to make these? visit Silvana's Dish Towel Diaries for the steps. Don't eat GF? Replace the GF flour with regular. Or just eat as is. You'd never freaking know. Trust me. There's a 14 year old boy sitting next to me inhaling one right now who just said so.

Monday, November 22, 2010

I got better things to do with my time...

I get songs out of the ether. They slip out and wave when I need them most. I tend to replay music to death because certain 'albums' will be soundtracks to chunks of my life. This one slid right out of the past tonight and kissed me on the cheek. Seems I needed it.

I've spend the better part of 39 years (come December 1) trying to please those looking on. And I'm learning every day that slips by that that's a hunormous waste of time. I've known it for a while, but it's hard to break old perfectionist attitudes, especially self-imposed ones. My worst jailer is me. My worst warden is self. I'm trying to focus on how I feel about stuff only. And those closest to me. The people who form the nucleus of my life. It's hard for me. I'm sort of a rabid people pleaser who likes to appear in whatever pretty package the onlooker expects or desires. It's kind of exhausting, though. I think I might be embarking on a slice of life titled: Cutting Self Some Fucking Slack...

So this song is in my head on a loop at the moment (though The Black Keys are my current work soundtrack). I'm taking a bit of time off this week to enjoy the fam. It seems well deserved and hugely needed. I hope you and yours have a superb holiday where you can sit back, stuff yourselves whether it be turkey or tofurkey or turkey-like-substance burritos from the 7-11. I hope it's full of laughter and fun and peace and sharing.

As an aside, Phil Collins was huge when I was a freshman and sophomore in high school. I do think that Face Value and No Jacket Required are at the top of my formative years play list. I thought he was a sexy motherfucker. My friends--all Tom Cruise and Emilio Estevez addicts--laughed at me. But I was a word whore, English Lit centered, GT student then and to me, anyone who could write lyrics like that and sing them so you felt the tug and pull of emotion in your belly was...well, a sexy motherfucker, no matter the package. That's how I roll to this day. I don't care if you're wrapped in a short man in a suit with an accent and thinning hair or a six foot six athlete. It's all about the innards. No turkey pun intended.



Saturday, November 20, 2010

dude, those are like...claws

There is a tiny affliction in my family, that odd object speak to us. I had it happen in high school with a Buddha pendant from and antique kiosk and my mother ended up buying it for me for Christmas that year because it was all I talked about. I still have it and I still wear it.

It happened to boy child this summer down in Hampden on the Avenue at an antique store. We ended up bringing home a carved wooden statue of a Japanese fisherman with what appeared to be a alien-like head. Like close encounters alien. The head, though human and matching the body, seems oddly disproportionate to the rest of him. But I digress...

As you can see, it happened to girl child today at a local bazaar with "The Chief". That is how he was labeled. I think they missed the words "Creepy Pants". Big Chief Creepy Pants seems about right. Yes, it is plaster, yes it is huge (about 2 feet), yes it is hand painted by a non professional--no, no! I know you think it was but I assure you, despite its impeccable facade it is definitely the work of an amateur. (Oh. My. God) appears to be sporting rather deadly talons instead of fingernails on the hand that is clutching the AXE!

(funny aside: she says to me "Maybe he is a Cherokee chief, Ma" as if this will make me feel better about her purchase. Our bloodline is heavily peppered with Cherokee, but somehow I don't think he'd care if we're related or not)

The amusing part of this to me is not that I have a blood thirsty half shifter Indian Chief armed with an axe in my home, it's that it was purchased by the same child that once made me lock a ventriloquist's dummy in the trunk of my car because she thought it was going to come into her room at night. Does she not fear Big Chief's death claws?

Anyhoo, here are some other pics

Our sunset tonight. The photo does not do it justice. It was pinky pinkerson and gorgeous.

When I turned around on the deck, this was on the other side. A gorgeous plump moon.

The fake fire where I mope and wallow (see blog below).
I am glad I have this fake fireplace to hang out in front of now that the sun has set, the moon is full and chief creepy pants is dragging his bodyless torso through my house with his deadly shifter talons so he can finish me off with his...AXE.

Maybe I'll lock him in the trunk of my car.


Friday, November 19, 2010

other stuff i assume i could be if i quit writing...

When I get a not so nice review I usually allow myself to wallow for one day. One day to bury my head in the sand and hide and feel sorry for myself. ONE. If I go beyond that it is just ridiculous because it is unreasonable and sad to expect that everyone in the whole world should like you and/or your work--whether your work is phone service or fiction writing.

I found a bad review quite by accident. It was buried amidst so many good ones, and still, that one bad one instantly negated all the numerous good ones for me (because I have issues, yo). So today is my official wallow day.

Since finding the one bad kernel amongst a whole can of good ones, I have watched episode two of The Walking Dead on demand (nothing says self loathing like zombies), I have written several pages of new book (and questioned and second guessed every durn word), the man dragged me to the home improvement store--which was oddly soothing and nice in a bizarre "this is like a mental institution but with power tools" kind of way, walked his fatness with the man.

I am now sitting in front of my fake wood burning stove heater thingy my mother-in-law bought me contemplating the virtues of a self-shaming nap. (I would like to note that the fake fireplace heater thing is next to our actual functioning gas fireplace that we are too cheap to run). Whilst I sit here and enjoy this false blaze, I have made a short sad list of things I could be if I quit writing (and apparently assaulting folks with my thin veil of fiction wrapped around gobs of sex). Here goes:

$ dog salon receptionist (There is a dog salon by our home. Twice now they have put HELP WANTED signs in the window and I have chicItalickened out to go in and apply. For whatever bizarre reason, this has become my mental dream job (no, I am not kidding) should people stop buying my books and we require stuff like food and heat and shelter)
$ home improvement store worker person (like I said, oddly soothing in bright, clinical, soft rock being piped in overhead way)
$ the 'would you like fries with that' girl at any fast food restaurant (this needs zero explanation)
$ grocery store worker (again, oddly calming to me, possibly because I own one tween, one teen and one man and I am CONSTANTLY there, so to me it is like an extension of home only with food cold storage, bright lights, stock boys and again with the soft rock)
$ professional TV watcher (again, no explanation needed. seriously, if you need one, call me, we'll talk.)

That's my list for now. There might be others, but those are all I can think of. That nap is looking pretty good, wallowing is exhausting.


After the blog/Author's Note: I took a nap shortly after this blog. Then I watched the Top Chef Desserts finale I missed the other night. Etc, etc, etc.

Also, I wanted to say, when I post blogs like this it is not a desperate cry come stroke me, come stroke me, tell me I'm pretty, tell me I'm good... It's not. But you guys always rally and make me smile and sometimes LOL out loud (to quote Mr. Monk) so thanks and you totally rock my thinly veiled gobs of sex world ;)

Thursday, November 18, 2010

pros and cons of leaving the house like a 'normal' person

my lists i kept via my desktop sticky notes whilst writing 1500 words during a 1.5 hour span riddled with anxiety, ADD, trucker hats, cold spots and sniffling women (see blog below!).

I will do it again, no worries, but it seemed like a huge amount of rigamarole for 1500 words that I could have done here and done laundry and been WARM and had The People's Court on in the background.

However, occasionally I do miss working in an office with actual people around me. So beyond the rogue (and extremely stupid birds!) and the frigid temperatures and the was good and I will go back!

Because I am a masochist dontchaknow?

p.s. 'allowed' is totally supposed to be 'aloud' but my brain was frozen by then
p.p.s. can't read it? click it. it gets bigger! (yeah, yeah, buddy, i've been fooled by that one before...heh ;)~ )

My Big Day Out or What Happens When You Put A Writer-Recluse Person Out In The “Real” World For A Day:

And the day isn't even half over and here I am reporting!

I decided for some odd reason yesterday that I should change venue and write somewhere that is not here (home) today. So that is what I set out to do.

I would go to a new (undisclosed for my safety heh) location and write.

Hmm. Funny. I did not realize how much I have alienated myself these last five years—that’s how long I’ve been a full-time writer—until I set out to um…leave the house.

Don’t get me wrong. I got to my local library and the other local library and my mother’s and the folks at the grocery store practically high five me when I walk in for god’s sake, but here I was going somewhere I’ve been before (duh) but doing it with the intention to write.

First obstacle: my laptop does not fit in my laptop bag (I should say that the actual first obstacle was getting dressed. I was pole axed on what to wear to leave the house to sit in another location and type for a few hours). I tried and tried but my new laptop is too wide for my old laptop bag. No matter how much I mutter or try and convince it to fit. So I wrapped laptop in a scarf and put it in another tote bag (last year’s b/d gift from the lovely AT)

Second obstacle: Have I gotten lost? It seemed to take forever to get here. I mean seriously. I had one blinding moment of panic where I was sure I had totally flaked on how to get where I was going. (I have done that FYI. Forgotten how to get somewhere that is about seven minutes from my home and I’ve been a bazillion times. You call it funny, I call it Alzheimer’s)

Third obstacle: How did I get so many bags? Getting out of the car when I finally got here (after my round of ADD for the morning. Oh, a park! I should walk there! Oh, a corn field! Why have I never noticed that before? I should walk there…prolly not since it would be creepy and the farmer person who owns it will probably be mad) I had my laptop (tote)bag, my actual (book) tote bag, and my giant purse that could be a tote bag. Finally, I managed.

Then…I got inside and there was a slot that said: Do not put hand in this slot. Man…I so wanted to put my hand in that slot. But I did not! And I got inside and I realized a class was going on (okay, yes, I am in an alternate library in case you have not figured that out yet) and I had to sneak back to the quiet section. It is marked QUIET SECTION.

There were two women in the quiet section (a super fancy QS if I do say so myself). They were putting away quiet things. There are quiet tables and quiet windows and it really is gorgeous (despite the woman over there who is sniffling too much and is sooooo not being quiet). So I say to one woman, “Is it okay if I work on my laptop in here?”

Which is the world’s dumbest question, I know because she looked at me like I was on drugs and said “OF course”

So here I am! Working out of the house! Feeling a bit anxious about it. In the quiet room with the sniffly lady and who just walked in…oh! A man with glasses and a trucker’s cap. Hello trucker cap man.

What have I written? This blog.

Stay tuned to find out if I actually…did anything. More later

p.s. hey look my wifi works! have had this new laptop for about two months and am just now testing it out. i feel like a space alien being able to connect to the interent with my fancy laptop at a remote location. beam me up, Scottie? Scotty? Beam me up, Spock!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

I took a little...

trip back to Dirtyville and Kinkyville today! I found this traipsing around my old blog and love, love, love it. I wanted some of my new visitors to see it in case they hadn't. So, I'm posting it on my recently moved to brand new shiny!

The only diff is, if you are new to me and my stuff, at the end it would now read as SGP is now gone poof. :D

Beyond that I managed to drag self to American Education Week day for girl child's school, boy is home because our neighborhood had a mini tornado last night (oh no, Toto!) and the high school has no power so they sent students home. Yes, he is devastated. Hahaha! ha! It's funny because it's not true. Let's see, also, I sat down to watch a show for research for the paranormal I am neck deep in writing right now and fell asleep and then made GF chocolate cherry mini loaves to test out in case I want to give them for Xmas (when I woke up, obviously. I did not bake whilst asleep. Though that would be super cool and a huge time saver).

As a bizarre aside; You really see that you are an odd recluse type person--if you work for yourself--when you attend school events. Other parents are coming in all gussied up from work or heading out to work or whatnot. They have their phones clipped to their belts or purse straps. They're wearing suits and ties and heels and all that jazz. Me? I'm all "What day is it, anyway?"


Later... Author's Note: Man, this is the blog of run on sentences--I don't know why--it's like my sentences will not die, I say unto thee, and now I am just doing it to fuck with you...or maybe because I had too much of that mini chocolate cherry loaf thingamabob...

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

would you like whipped cream with that?

and I got four cherries from Ambrosia over at Whipped Cream Erotic Romance Reviews for Man In The Middle. Woo and also hoo. Thanks to her for taking the time to read and review (and like!) my little novella. :)

Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go will myself not to be getting this cold I feel like I'm getting. But I'm not getting it because I'm refusing to um...get it.

p.s. My mother-in-law bought me a fancy little heater that looks like fireplace and the man is reading the directions aloud (for whatever reason). First line in the book: Warning, this heater is hot...
p.p.s. I love how I started this blog with 'and' as if it continues on from the title. Which I often do. I start a thought or a sentence in the title and finish it first line in. But see, I did not do that this time, but wrote it as if I had. Hmm. I blame this cold I am so totally NOT getting.

the sofa

lulled me yesterday. I sort of had a slow motion day and the migraine waxed and waned and basically refused to simply vacate the premises all together. But I had good company. Mmm. Mitchell, George and Annie. And I got in SUPER BIG trouble with girl child when she got home from school because we had been watching season 1 of BBC's Being Human together. So then she and boy child had to hurry up and have a three episode marathon last night so we can all start season two today...*cough* stupid migraine. Making me watch ahead. I had nothing else to watch...I swear (((Supernatural seasons 1,2,3,4; Monk seasons 1,2,3,4,5; Psych season 1, Buffy season 1,2,; CSI; Burn Notice; and about 800 active TV channels. But beyond that...nothing)))

I did still manage about 2K on the current book between pain bouts. And today I feel sort of...hollow. If that makes any sense. But feeling much, much better, thanks to those of you who sent well-wishes. You rock!

p.s. Just in case anyone from the BBC is reading, I would not be against doing a guest spot as a woman woefully caught in a love triangle with Mitchell and George. Just saying...

Monday, November 15, 2010


today due to migraine. Went to bed early with it last, oh joy, it was still around when I woke up. So I'm bugging out for the day. It's wiped me out. You know, I used to live with these on a super regular basis. Several a week from the ages of 5-30. Now...I have no fucking clue how I did that.


Saturday, November 13, 2010

oh. my. god...

such a fierce cover. Thanks to Willsin Rowe my new December Ink release Justine (previously published 'back in the day' at Ruthie's Club) has a smoking hot cover. And it's out today at ARe, Bookstrand, etc, etc, etc...

And speaking of covers, this is my ham-handed segue into the fact that I've blogged on that very topic over at The Self Publishing Revolution. It's the 13th of the month, which means I'm over there running my mouth. Heh.



Friday, November 12, 2010

It's gonna be a hot, hot winter...

Cause...I am the lucky super duper awesomely lucky winner of both of these sexy books! Both new titles from Xcite. Justine Elyot is a writer I lurve and K D Grace is new to me so I'm super excited.

I plan to keep cozy this winter with some steamy smut. Yay. Me.

How am I winning these you ask? Go to Erotica For All and click Competitions and keep current with the giveaways.

You could keep warm too.


things that make me smile...

Seeing a seventy-plus year-old man raking and bagging leaves in a Buffy tee shirt. I was out walking his fatness and when I spotted it I was all...Is that Buffy? And then he turned around and I saw: Into each generation, a slayer is born...on his back.

Rock on, Mr. Leaf Man. Heh.

things that bug me...

Dentists recommend we drink everything (including coffee and wine) through straws to avoid staining our teeth. It will help keep them white, they say!

Dermatologists say never drink through straws as then you get those old lady wrinkles around your lips and you look like you've taken your dentures out (though you don't have dentures and could not possibly take out all your natural teeth).

So...I can have wrinkly old lady mouth or jacked up teeth...choose now! (O_O)


Thursday, November 11, 2010

my lucky day...

It must be! My second and third m/m novellas are out from Xcite (there were three). Yay and yay! and happy dance!

Here is the blurb for Ferryman:

Charon's only job is to make another man happy. No matter what. Even if the demands of his rock star boss twists his heart until he admits to himself exactly what he want – Graham for his own. Against all odds.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand, the blurb for Report For Repair. {Funny story, we have that oak in our neighborhood, we have not made peace yet, that tree and I. But I forgive it a little, because it gave me the idea for this book. Ha!}

Report for Repair brings us a very determined Chance whose arch nemesis – a dead oak – becomes his ticket to seeing a very hot Sunshine Gas and Electric man who is definitely making him work for it. But that's fine, Chance isn't above taking matters into his own hands.

An excerpt of each is on the Xcite site. All three of the new m/m novellas (also see Unexpected below) are now available on Xcite and All Romance Ebooks and coming soon to other places. Woohoo! :)


Wednesday, November 10, 2010

there was a little german in my mailbox today...

and it wasn't a wiener dog! It was the German translation of Misbehaviour and my story "Phone Sex" translated to Telefonsex (I think that's what it said. It's up on the porn shelf). And look at that gorgeous nekkidness on the cover! What is German for fierce?



it's been ages since...

I've laughed so hard I've wept. I did that last night. I needed it badly! Especially right now with lots of looking deadlines and details, a fresh version of what I call Celiac hell complete with food diaries, yet more food eliminations, pain and struggling to feel 'normal' some days. And in the midst of it, trying to ignore the fact that sometimes I feel like total and absolute poo (but sometimes I do not! focus on that. focus...Om).

Anyway, I read this last night thanks to a tweet by a little twitter bird named Lauren Flax. Her tweet led me to this blog which led me to actually laughing so hard I was crying, wheezing and yes, felt a bit like I might be sick.

If that sounds like fun, go read it!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010


my m/m novella Unexpected is out on All Romance Ebooks. This new erotic romance from Xcite Books is up for release officially 11/11 but I guess ARe is so smoking hot, they got an early start. Woop and woohoo!

Here's the blurbage from the publisher:

When gay guy Charlie agrees to father a baby for his friend Mariah he has no idea that, uanble to cope, she'd disappear to California and he'd be left holding the baby. Then he meets Giovanni, all lean and kinetic and beautiful who not only brings some sunshine back into his life but adores children too.